Many others have their own way to be in loved, few of them created their ways not to be in loved. Besides who will thought if I can continue to love a girl. Admiration is the only thing I can imagine when I think that I am really in love for her. Yes, for entire of my life I don’t have a single love in my life. Only my family I am thinking about, but what about else the love I can find for the real girl I really love. Somehow I don’t have a single girlfriend since my birth. Of course, everyone knows that being as puppy love is only you can imagine of to be in love for something else. What will I tell you is about my love life during I met a two dozens of girls? But none of them became my girlfriend. It’s hugely a crush only. Yes, admiration and appreciation is the only thing I can think about her. I love her no matter what. Since I have been talking about my love life, I suggest that you have stay relax there and read my article as the story goes on.

 

The first crush I have had in my entire life was during when I was in fifth grade. Of course, there was a puppy love again. Too much of watching television sometimes read my thoughts that when will I have my own girlfriend. But somehow that too much of watching television didn’t learn me well. I have had a first crush in fifth grade. I was dying to have a girlfriend back then. But you see, this is not about the crush. It’s about the love I am seeking for the girl. When I entered the sixth grade, all it became was also a failure. Of course prior to have a crush is not the sin you are making. It’s the only admiration and appreciation you are seeking for the girl you really love. And I, of course, was a male. Can’t you rub your eyes if you want to be falling in love with this girl? Of course not. But to tell you that this is not the first time. In face, there are many second chances. But third chances sometimes won’t accept the love you are making. Here are the tips that you need to know from me:

1. Do not look in her eyes unless you know what to say to her

2. Do not afraid to open conversation that you have crush for her

and finally 3. Find something you really like to know about her.

 

I realized there were many ways to be fall in love with this girl, but somehow I became not hearing too much of attention not to fall for this girl. Then I thought myself that was the only I failed to make some impression for her. I tried anything just to show my talents. I created how to be like her, but somehow it didn’t me prove that much. Then I realized it’s the last time I do this on my own. About this when I entered the seventh grade, my elementary friends were my classmates. But another set of schoolmates became also my classmates. My original batch of elementary friends already graduated from the sixth grade and advanced to their own to high school. This was not my first time I heard about the seventh graders. But to tell you, being as a alone and the only one seventh grade in Montessori Integrated School of Antipolo became the history itself. Because I was the last and only seventh grader who graduated there in elementary. All of them went to several schools. But the fate was changed when I entered the seventh grade. Some of my schoolmates were teasing me as a mongoloid back when I was in elementary. To be realized that somehow amazed me during the time I have never noticed about that.

 

Since during that time became unchanged, one of the honored students became my crush. Then I thought about her middle name. It was that I am not the only one who have and my family of maiden’s name. My mother’s name carried in my name. So I thought whether I want to be falling in love of her. I started to make a change. My other subjects improved. But the three main subjects Filipino, English and history were still unchanged and unimproved. Also my remaining subjects were one by one changing through the school year quarters. My grade in Science and the basic elementary Mathematics was improved although I have still remaining to learn from the school. What about you when you are intelligent? For my perspective point of view, when you have lower grades doesn’t mean your life is over for your scholarship means. I really came from the lower grades of my subjects. When you are fighting to be improved, you still have to be continue. And always remain to be calm and be respected for other classmates you have. Do not afraid to lose in the battle when you have lower improvements in life. There are many lessons in life that needed to be change. Somehow I realized from my opinion. Do you have them when I still have that? Maybe or maybe not.

 

In high school, my life changed so fast dramatically. I became not to be worried about my love life and school life as well. Love was not the only you can enjoyed in your life but to reminded you need it to be change. Life was not cruel. Life, in fact, are challenges in life that you need to be learn in the future when you are facing them. I have sacrificed anything just to study back when I was in high school. Besides, life was nothing if the world is tumbling around you. So to ask and so to say.

 

Freshman year, the new beginning of life in high school, became my part of my life. New chapter was opened and new contents were about to be unfolded. I began to fall in love more in Science, the deeper inside of me rushed my life was. But to think of it, I have never imagined  I could find another love of my life. One by one, or maybe two became my crushes. I long forgotten their names but in the literary works I have had still recorded their names. To be falling n love was not my first option. But rather, I chose to live away from my love life. Then about in sophomore year, I became unknown and been mystery in my life. Back from the days my school mates and my classmates bullied me all the time. I stood from my pain and hatred. I became how to be proud I was today when I found out that I really have had a down syndrome. It’s not the sickness you know. It is rather hard to explain if you continue to read my other posted articles. To tell you the truth, I never imagined in my life to continue this way. The way our biology teacher told us about the genetics. This kind of trisomy 21 was deeper inside of me, then it came the down syndrome teachings from my biology teacher. Since then, I never looked back in the past. Instead I will create the things that will be my future to be change. When I know to be happen that way, I realize there are nothing really happen in my life.

 

Junior year and senior year, the prom came into my life. The first one was the junior year prom. I have dated someone else in my relatives. Then my mother chose my younger auntie to be dated there. I was of course, excited to dance with her in the dance floor. With her beautiful eyes and beautiful smile, I looked her dazzling smile killing my classmates to dance with her. Of course, I was chosen as the best dressed man there. But I have never chosen to be a king for the night. It was okay for me that night since I learned somehow not to be nominated anyway. If I were be nominated, I would probably ended up all of my school mates and classmates to choose me as the king for the prom nights. That was the classic movie tales. But this was the true-noted story I have been ever told. Life was again a cruel for me. Senior year of course became my challenging years because it became our last year of staying in high school.

 

Years from the past learned me very well. That senior year, I have tried to date one of the freshman year in high school. Then again, her parents knew about my mother. Hopefully it won’t be the last for me. But eventually I didn’t continue to date her after all. It’s because I was afraid too much of commitment of falling in love to a girl. It was my first try. And she knew that I have had a crush on her. About to graduated from high school, entering in college was very challenging for me also that year of 2000. It was difficult for me to change after leaving the school behind my back. But to admit, I have lost interests going back to that school again. Because despite we were living in Quezon City, that school was in Antipolo. And also that year, I noticed that Maxene Magalona entered the Montessori Integrated School of Antipolo about her sophomore year from her former school of Assumption Antipolo. All of the Magalona siblings were transferred to Montessori Integrated School to study. Name all of them. They were Maxene, Frank, Saab, Elmo and Arkin Magalona, the five out of eight children of late master rapper Francis Magalona. They were all there to study. But to think of imagining of that, of all things Francis chose the school where I was studying. Of course, I didn’t mention to you that they were a lot things happen in the school. The remembrance of the second generation of Gimik were there. The likes of the original cast were there to shoot for their school part. But that was the only Saturdays they chose to shoot there since it has no school hours. I still remembered that.

 

During my high school years, I have noticed that I changed so well because Rico Yan became my huge inspiration since then and now. After college years were also bitter to leave in the school. I was already old to enter again in the school because the history were not meant to be change but to learn hard ways from your knowledge and experiences. Torn from my love life and school life was a bitter for me. But to tell you the truth, it challenges our life to learn in our ways. What could you imagine if you cannot leave your doings in the past? Probably it won’t be happen for anything else to be change.

 

If I don’t change for the better, somehow I look myself in the mirror when will my last from the fate of what I really love. During before I was in elementary, I already wanted to be a volcano photographer picturing every volcanoes in the world. In fact until now, Science becomes a role for me to study. If I didn’t manage to found out that I have down syndrome. I would end probably in some special school until today. Nobody in the history graduated in college that you really acknowledged your school before. I really love to teach some children but teaching is not my field. I have other things I can teach, but to teach instead the uneducated people about the down syndrome knowledge I really have in my mind.

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