I finally understand what it means for me. If a new profound family is awaiting for me, then I will definitely go back where I am going. I’m blind to see my own future. I only tell what my mind tells me to do at the back of my head. It’s contradicting me my own words. My actions is contradicting to my words. What leaves me behind is my reflection.


I may be gone in a while. But I will be not gone forever. It’s all beyond that matters what needs to know from myself and my knowledge. Should anyone acknowledge me beside the matters? Or perhaps I might thinking over all the words I always say outside at the back of my mind. Losing myself on the ground caused a lot of troubles the past week. Then I reflected too much of myself. I needed to know what mistakes should I learn. And from what I learn, there’s always a new beginning of new life.


The school loves me. The teacher loves me. My own self discovered the truth. And so it says the half truth. No matter what the world is looking me down, I’m always looking for up for them to know that I’m stronger and I’m still here around the corner. Thousands of shattered broken glass may find hard to bring it back to altogether. The hope seems lost. But the new hope doesn’t lit out from the light. It’s only bringing up back behind what it tells me to do inside at the back of my head. Moving forward is a moving picture. And moving picture tells me a moving positive sides. All those who are not attracting to one self sometimes are repelling to each other because of one’s place loses only themselves. Maybe that’s the hope is talking about at the back of my mind.


One week of reflection, one week of full coming back to my thoughts, one week of preparations and one week full of awaiting dreams for me are more than possible things I should done for more. But the patience overcomes me. I should realize that emotions sometimes are killing me over my own self. Looking myself in front of the mirror tells me that I’ve to move forward. Moving forward is what I have to tell my mind always. A thousand of reflections would have been passe me all down. But I decide what it keeps me holding on to my future.


Last week was torturing me because of my emotions but I followed my intentions. Going back around means a lot to me. Going back around is what makes me stronger. And going back around is what it defines me all about. I may be not a perfect human. I make mistakes also and admit to my lose once again on the ground. In times, “some battles may find to be winning, but some few battles may find losing all the time.” Whatever it may contradicts to me anymore, I finally understand what it makes me stronger. Then I want to get it back what’s missing of piece of puzzle tells me about.


It’s not me anymore. But it’s all about what I get meant to be have on myself. And I’m patience what defines me. But I’m not overwhelm what it needs to have explanations. Some problem may find it not overdue, but it always look solutions all the time. Problem has careless to think, but it has more attention proving it needed to be resolving soon. Tempting to do a mistake is what makes me stronger. But I finally understand myself what it doesn’t need to be contradicting me anymore.


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